Tag Archives: Waterbank News

Airport Monthly has awarded Archerfield Airfield with another award, this time the “Airport of the Month” award for January 2018.

“There are soooooooo many airports,” said a AM staffer, “so getting to the top means your airport has something special.”

Asked whether the airfield was getting special treatment because of the Archerfield Free Post being based there the staffer denied it.

“No, it’s because it has two great fields, a shooting range, kangaroos, a Waterbank News office, a shopping center, a dock, and…” the staffer took a deep breath, “an aviation school, a dock, ZSK, and a possible royal connection to the Duke of Archer.”


Waterbank Airlines has hit the news again after a whistleblower from the airline came forward and said that the Waterbank Airlines has been a taxi service for the Waterbank Intelligence Agency for several years now.

“The Waterbank News guy asked if anyone wanted to come forward with some dirt to print,” said the WA employee, “and I said ‘sure, I got time to kill. I ain’t had nothin’ to do all day but blow this stupid whistle.”

The plans taken by New Year’s heist thieves is code named “Ripper,” a new product in development by Feral Marine.

Lawyers are descending on Waterbank News as the secret documents that were allegedly stolen in the New Year’s heist have come to light.

“We found this roll of blueprints and printouts on a body in Blackslough,” an ERIA PD officer told us. “It looked like some kind of new patrol ship. While we were dealing with the body, the plans were yoinked from the hood of our car.”

The new thief was chased into the mountains behind East River Intercontinental Airport and escaped. They were later caught by a mounted patrol near the peak.

“I heard this ridiculous evil laughter and thought I had better check it out,” said the Sheriff’s Department deputy on patrol that day. “The guy was laughing like a fool until I arrested him and took the plans. The guys at the station nicknamed him ‘Mopey’ after that.”

The plans were then placed on the front desk of the Sheriff’s office in Pippen, where they were yoinked again. That, dear readers, is how you see them here.

Waterbank Police attempted a raid in Prototype after a lead indicated that the missing WN reporters may actually being held in a container truck traveling through that area.

“Every trucker goes to the Rodex in Prototype,” said the officer in charge of the raid. “If there was one place to catch them, that was it. We got out and had searched two trucks when Prototype State Police showed up and kicked us out. Unfortunately Waterbank doesn’t have the pull it used to.”

This photo was taken after the raid. “It was a long drive,” explained the officer leaving the restroom.

More reporters from the Waterbank News have disappeared, leaving one solitary reporter in the office.

“It’s freaking me out,” I said, as I put my feet on the editor’s desk. “I just hope they’re safe.”

Waterbank Police have opened a case on the disappearances, and have been pursuing far flung leads. “These reporters really get around,” one officer said.

Several Waterbank News reporters have gone missing, and the Sheriff’s Department is asking for help in locating them. According to friends the reporters were on a “rackpacking trip,” where they would only put liquor from the ‘rack’ in their packs. They started out on Friday afternoon and no one thought anything was strange until Tuesday,” explained the Sheriff’s Department.

“We should have started looking earlier,” the spokeswoman explained, “but we were disgusted that they were drinking such cheap liquor.”