Tag Archives: VICE

A Claw B-17 prepares to drop Maple Bars on unsuspecting breakfast crowds at Tulagi

The Claw has been using Archerfield (SLAL) for its ongoing “Doughnuts Dat R Da Bomb” campaign and it’s got the Coastal Patrol up in arms.

“We can’t believe that they would be so willing to have them there,” said a CP pilot we found in a Tulagi bar.

“They pay their tie down fees,” retorted an Archerfield night manager. “That’s more than I can say for the Coastal Patrol.”


“I love every minute of this job,” said a Claw pilot arrested in the Tulagi combat region after his plane was shot down. The B-17 was flying crullers and French twists to Fletcher’s Field when a fighter dove from the sun and hit two of his engines. “1 and 2 were out before I could say ‘icing on an old fashioned’,” said the pilot, “but that ZSK bird is such a pleasure to fly, even with two smoking engines and a major pull to the left it was like riding on clouds.”

“Black clouds,” retorted a Coastal Patrol member who had the pilot in custody.

The Claw pilot shook his head at the CP member. “Say what you like, but I love this job. And you gotta ask yourself, what are they gonna eat at Fletcher Field now?”


An anomaly traveler to the Tulagi WWII combat area took this photo of known Claw figurehead, Randomletters69sf, visiting the illustrious ZSK factory.

“I was shocked, ya know,” said the adventure tourist, “here’s this big time pirate looking at a B-17 body and nodding with appreciation. It was chilling and affirming.”

The Claw has been known to send out fighter and bomber crews into the region for combat experience. “We strive for improvement,” randomletters69sf said in an interview with Airport Monthly. “What better way to do it than with real combat situations?”