Tag Archives: Feral Marine

Grace Development Agency is showcasing two new hot properties near Feral Marine’s Blake Sea showroom, off of Route 14. Omne property is 38,000L for 17040 meters (2.2L per m), and another, a beach property, is 512m for 6890 (13.5L per m). Properties can be seen at Gormthoog (link)


A new ship pulled into the Feral Marine main store docks today, surprising the sales staff. “We had no clue it was arriving, but there it was with the logo and everything,” one sales staff said.

The sales staff was further surprised when the crew, all dressed in military gear disembarked from the boat and calmly walked up the hill to the airport, where they boarded a C-130 with no markings and departed.

The mystery boat is still sitting at the Feral Main Store, and sales staff have told us that when they contacted the CEO, Volchia Ferduccio, she told them to “ignore it.”

The boat, believed to be Project Ripper, is rumored to be in sea trials and weapons system development. Rez Gray, the developer behind GridTalkie has been seen doing some work onboard. But he would not say a word to reporters or anyone else. Ammunition, weapons, and fuel have all been seen by the sales staff being loaded onboard.

“It’s kinda freaking me out, all this secrecy,” said one sales staff member.

The plans taken by New Year’s heist thieves is code named “Ripper,” a new product in development by Feral Marine.

Lawyers are descending on Waterbank News as the secret documents that were allegedly stolen in the New Year’s heist have come to light.

“We found this roll of blueprints and printouts on a body in Blackslough,” an ERIA PD officer told us. “It looked like some kind of new patrol ship. While we were dealing with the body, the plans were yoinked from the hood of our car.”

The new thief was chased into the mountains behind East River Intercontinental Airport and escaped. They were later caught by a mounted patrol near the peak.

“I heard this ridiculous evil laughter and thought I had better check it out,” said the Sheriff’s Department deputy on patrol that day. “The guy was laughing like a fool until I arrested him and took the plans. The guys at the station nicknamed him ‘Mopey’ after that.”

The plans were then placed on the front desk of the Sheriff’s office in Pippen, where they were yoinked again. That, dear readers, is how you see them here.

Law enforcement was laughing today when a Feral Marine strike force – a team assembled by the company to conduct paramilitary operations – went to a restroom in Brooks and caught one of the New Year’s heist suspects.

“He was just standing there with his – well you know,” said one of the strike team. “My partner had to go really bad and he started laughing when he saw this bozo that I really thought he was gonna lose it. That was the hardest part of the arrest – all of us had to go.”

After some creative tactical maneuvers all members of the three person team and the suspect were able to continue the apprehension. Feral Marine is holding the individual in custody and has refused to hand over the suspect to Helvellyn PD.

The Sheriff’s Department and Coastal Patrol have put in a large order for Feral Marine’s MLB (link) after it won an award from the WBA.

“If the WBA likes it,” explained a Sheriff’s Department rep, “then we like it!”

The Sheriff Department and Coastal Patrol have even gone a step further by releasing a paint (link to paint) for local departments to customize their MLBs.

“Goodness oughta be shared,” said a rep at the CP.

After the jump, the product notecard:
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Beach goers were amused and pleased when a Sheriff’s Department MLB pulled up to a dock on the East River to warn a local that they shouldn’t wash abalone on the dock.

“Look at that dock,” the Deputy had scolded the local. “It looks like a clown barfed all over it!”

The local seemed not to care, but admitted that they shouldn’t have washed them on the dock after they slipped while trying to walk away.

“It’s nice when Karma doesn’t delay,” said the Deputy.

With the possibility that the New Year’s heist of Feral Robotics documents was an inside job, Feral Marine has hired private detectives to track down the papers. No comment was available from Feral, but one crackpot at Feral Grounds Coffee told us what she knew.

“Ya can’t blame Feral. HPD couldn’t find their ——- in their own zipper, and the Sheriff’s is so busy playing with their toys they can’t see the street. Only a private dick knows the score.”