Mowry Extends Borders, Roads Improved, and Muirhead Separatists Attack


The town of Mowry has extended its borders after a controversial bill passed the town assembly. “They took advantage of us,” complained an assemblyperson. “We were having cobbler at the Cat Cafe’ when they passed it. Otherwise we would have never passed it.”

The measure claims lands that are already part of other East River communities and is likely to be debated in local courts. East River watchers think it has something to do with the “Mowry Grand Plan” which has commenced with road improvements.

Also in the news this week are several “attacks” by Muirhead Separatists. “They’re not too scary,” said a Muirhead resident, “it’s hard to feel frightened by free doughnuts.”


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