Claw Gains Popular Support In Blake Sea

DutchClaw A Bandit 55 sails into Dutch Harbor bearing the Claw flag in support of the new “doughnut offensive.”

The Claw, long considered to a blight, has been gaining popular support among some island owners for their “Doughnuts For Drinkers” campaign.

The new public relations campaign of the nefarious organization drops dozens of doughnuts onto beach bars across the Blake Island chain.

“I no longer care if they steal from a tanker,” said one drunk patron with a mouth full of doughnut, “as long as they give me a maple bar from time to time.”

A WIA representative only groaned when we asked for a comment on the story.


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