Crabs Overrun Dock on East River!

Locals were shocked when a low tide exposed hundreds of East River Crabs feasting on the wood of docks. “It was like a horror movie,” said one local fisherman. “They were clamboring over each other and making a loud sound like water dripping onto tin.”

“It could reach epidemic proportions unless someone starts catching them,” said a sober Fish and Game Officer from East River. “They are populating faster than the birds can catch them.”

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